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The Hybrid: The Game, As Always, The Game

by Bobby Loesch on November 24, 2010 at 12:37PM


"I always had dreams, my whole life, of being somebody special. Someone out in the world that everybody knew of and everybody liked. Somebody unique. Even when I was down on my luck, in my head I still had those dreams. Sometimes in people's lives, when bad stuff happens, their dreams just die, and they end up settling. I guess that's their decision, maybe, because they didn't believe in their dreams or forgot their dreams. My dreams never died."

It's Michigan-Ohio State week.

tresselblank.jpgDUN DUN DUN.

In some ways, it's always Michigan-Ohio State week. (I'm already getting too dramatic).

Speaking of drama... discussing the The Game last year, things got pretty intense around here.
I've had a lot of really weird ideas when it comes to watching the game this year. Part of me thought about watching it naked. Like some sort of weird baptism-y thing. Part of me wanted to put on layers and layers of clothes and just curl up in the fetal position until I started sweating out the demons of Tressel and The Game.
Well... I, uh, did the naked thing. It did not work. And getting dressed as the final seconds ticked off the clock was shameful and pathetic, as it should of been. I was so alone.

Tressel, man.

I don't have many words for the game -- err, The Game -- this year. It's the same old story with Michigan. Big picture, they lose to Ohio State always. Small picture, it's the offense >>>>>>>>>>>> defense thing.

Brian at mGo pointed this out earlier in the week: all of Michigan's losses result in the offense stalling early, the defense consistently blowing throughout, and the offense storming back into the game, creating a "too little, too late" situation as its just. not. enough. to complete the comeback each time.

If Michigan could somehow get off to a hot start, going point for point with Ohio State seems realistic. I'm not talking myself into them winning. I'm not even talking myself into them being competitive. I'm not even going to make a "I'm just sayin' maybe!"-type prediction like last week. The chances are slim, but it's not impossible. That's always the case with sports. It's what compels us.

I'm still in the mindset I had last year: UM might not be Ohio State this year, or next year, or in 10 years, but, at some point, it will happen. And it will be glorious.

Michigan gets the game at home next year. Denard will be a junior, if still alive. That's a good base. But 2011 is for 2011. This is 2KX. We'll see how it plays out. As always: fuck you, Tressel.

tresselstuff.jpg
Oh, and that quote in the intro was The Situation.

* * *

May it always be known I love Iowa State: I know it's basketball but ...this video.


Oh man. While the video itself is not funny, I think the context makes it.

Crucial elements...
1) The shot should not have counted, but they didn't have monitors available for review
2) The ISU mascot, Cy, dressed up as a referee
3) It was a legitimately thrilling moment for ISU athletics

That school is so great.

I mean, they stole USC's jerseys.

THE HYBRID
Quick, Selective Hits On The BCS Top 25

1) Oregon: Just the coolest everything.

2) Auburn
3) TCU
4) Boise State
5) LSU:
Shook Jeremiah, somehow*.

* - Les Miles, LES MILES, LES MILES, LES MILES

6) Stanford
7) Wisconsin:
A complete assault in Ann Arbor. They might has well have played children.

8) Ohio State
: Escape Iowa City on TP's legs and Iowa's typical late game bullshit.

9) Oklahoma State
: Congrats on hitting win No. 10. That seems like a big deal as it hasn't happened in a while (not looking up the date). And, in better news for me, T. Boone Pickens is my No. 1 recommended connection on LinkedIn.

tboone.jpg
No idea.

10) Michigan State
: Thee most putrid, ridiculous, bullshit win of the college football season. This team is ridiculous. They got lit up by Iowa. IOWA. That play against Purdue where the dude on MSU fumbled it into the end zone, only to have the Purdue o-lineman miss the ball and have a different MSU dude land on it for the TD? Ugh city. And a blocked punt, of course. God, Purdue sucks. They don't ever do anything.

11) Alabama:
Watchu got, Sabes?

12) Arkansas
13) Oklahoma
14) Missouri
15) Nebraska:
Why are people so pissed about the Pelini brothers stuff? Because one of them maybe pushed a photographer-ish dude and the other yelled at his QB and was probably a dick in the heat of battle? I don't know, man. Maybe I'm missing something. Just kinda seems like coaches being coaches.

16) Virginia Tech:
That James Madison loss will always be one of the biggest "what ifs" of this season.

17) Texas A&M
18) South Carolina
19) Nevada
20) Utah
21) Arizona
22) Florida State
23) North Carolina State
24) Iowa:
Fourth quarter losers.

They have the same record as Michigan.

25) Mississippi State


Any Sweet Games This Weekend?

Friday
Auburn (2) at Alabama (11):
Game of the week. I find myself really wanting Auburn to lose this game, which makes no sense as I dig Auburn and love Cam Newton. College football is such a hate-based sport, and it's disappointing it creates this. Do I really want to see a mid-major in the national title that badly? Is Auburn-Oregon not our best case scenario still?

Arizona (21) at Oregon (1): Well this is a decent little game, isn't it? Tough to see Arizona winning.

Boise State (4) at Nevada (19):
Real game? Real game.

Saturday
Michigan at Ohio State (8):
RichRod, JT, RichRod, JT / JT, TP, JT, TP, JT, TP, JT, TP / Dee-naaaaaaaaard.

Michigan State (10) at Penn State: MSU loses games like this. They do. And Penn State it totally capable of making it happen.

LSU (5) at Arkansas (12): The Les Miles death march to the national title continues.

Florida at Florida State (22): Florida's still unranked? That's great.

TCU (3) at New Mexico: Boring.

College Football Bandwagon

Every year, once my actual favorite teams have been eliminated from the national title picture (by, you know, losing just one game), my buddy Ryan and I create what we call the "College Football Bandwagon" which mostly consists of a list of all the undefeated BCS conference teams minus Notre Dame (and sometimes others). The goal of the CFB is to fake feel good about yourself when your "team" makes the national title game. Plus it gives you invested fake rooting interests.

College Football Bandwagon 2010

Last week's bandwagon: Auburn, Oregon, Boise State, TCU

I decided over the weekend that it's time to cut the crap and add Boise back to the bandwagon -- they're cool, rack up points, and they never lose -- left-handed QB be damned. TCU lost to Boise last year, and, to supplement that (because I'm not a huge fan of using previous season's stuff to justify this season's stuff), TCU's vaunted defense is probably overrated. I mean, San Diego State put up 35 of them last week. Oregon State hit 21 against them in Week 1. While the unit is undoubtedly talented, I'd really question them keeping Oregon, Auburn, or Boise (again.) in check if they were to play them in the national title game. Not to say letting up points to any of these schools wouldn't be understandable, but it's just annoying to see a defense get hype when they don't really play anybody.

boisecheer2.jpg
Ryan also weighs in on Boise's re-addition and TCU's exclusion:
Not opposed. [TCU head coach] Gary Patterson's appearance on College Gameday at Wrigley pissed me off. Even a douche like RichRod [ed. - RichRod is not a douche at all he's cool] wouldn't fly 1000 miles during his bye week to promote why his team deserves respect. This doesn't mean I like Boise though.
He adds:
...it was pointed out by Chris Fowler that [Patterson] was in Bristol, Conn., for interviews on Friday. So he actually went to ESPN and then to Wrigley to promote his team. Can't do interviews via satellite anymore? He went on to throw stats out about how they beat BCS teams in the past, made reference to beating Adrian Peterson and Oklahoma in 2005. Pointed out, "we're 2-0 against Stanford, who's in the Top 10 the last 4 years". Really? They beat Stanford in 2007 and 2008. Stanford went 4-8 and 5-7 those years. And other than this year, the last time Stanford finished in the top 10 was 1992. They went 8-5 last year. It was just dumb.
Boise also beat Peterson, for what it's worth. Man, is Patterson an idiot or what?

TCU, you're fucking out.

pattersonmad.jpg

This week's bandwagon: Auburn, Oregon, Boise State, TCU

Big Ten Rant

1) Wisconsin sucks: Can someone make a case for why power football is good and exciting? Yes, if I coached Wisconsin, I'd probably have them run the same horrible, boring, up-the-middle runs behind huge ass o-linemen who killed everyone -- because that's our personnel. We'd probably win at least 75% of our games, and the games would get played really fast, but god. damn. -- could you imagine if every team played like that? It would be the 1940s. I'm not saying every team should spread 'n' shred (or die trying!), but isn't passing what makes football great? Maybe that's too liberal of a thought.

/stewing about last week

/loves the triple option, which solidifies me as the ultimate hypocrite

2) Ohio State sucks:
Stop wearing your bullshit fake throwbacks for The Game each year.

The game should look like this.

oldthegame.jpg
Not this.

newthegame.jpg
Ah, whatever. I guess if Michigan can't meet you halfway on the field, you don't have to meet them all the way in the uniform department

Speaking of Michigan sucking...

3) Michigan SUCKS:
I love Michigan, and I love all of the white people and most of the traditions, but this video... this video nearly meets "Someday We'll Go All The Way" at the 'lamest things related to a team'  summit.


The visuals aren't awful (eh, somewhat awful), but the narration totally kills it. I just don't get who sat down and thought it was a good idea. And an even better idea to show people.

Tim Tebow Pro Check-In

Delightful Tebow failure this week. Monday Night Football, big stage, McDaniels maybe with something to prove... and yet, DNP. Just terrific.

Shanoff weighs in:
I'm a bit bitter that TT didn't get any PT.
And I feel like me again.


Cry, cry, cry.

Season Standings
SUCCESSES: 3
FAILURES: 7

Next week: Broncos vs. Rams ... Tebow versus Bradford!

What They Said -- A Take On Others' CFB Takes

Got nothin'.

Random Picture I Came Across While Googling Stuff For This Post

boiseband.jpg

Wrapping It Up...

This is usually the part of the season where I say The Hybrid is done, but I might come back and write stuff later (and I never do), so we'll see. This could be the last one, but maybe I'll come back with a scaled down version for the lighter weeks that end the regular season. Me writing less is definitely what's best for everyone.

Go Blue.

Bobby Loesch is the assistant editor of Tremendous Upside Potential. He can be reached at bobbyloesch [at] gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter @bobbystompy.




14 Comments | Leave a comment



Left-handed QB > Redheaded QB

TCU probably should have always been the pariah of the group based solely on the fact that their mascot is the "Horned Frog" (which isn't even a fucking frog) and they have that claw/Devil hand gesture (not that I should be the one to comment on hand gestures.../[]_[])

The U hand gesture is cool.

I dunno, I kinda like the horned frog mascot. It's not a real thing, though?

And what does this claw gesture look like? Is it this? http://www.dlcache.indiatimes.com/imageserve/056Oft86Ft5j5/350x.jpg

Haha, I've never seen that before.

You would like the horned frog (/lizard)

THIS is the claw (not antlers): http://bit.ly/fjlmva

And obviously The U hand gesture is cool. I was just trying to be humble before -- it didn't sit well with me either.

I bet Tressel has some very unique sexual fetishes.

It'll be interesting to see what the pro scouts and NFL GM's think about the players from these four schools. My guess is that there won't be too many of them selected in the first few rounds of the draft; left handed or otherwise.

"The Game" ... ?

This is a tough call for me, but after some serious heart-searching, I have to pull for OSU.

Now if Michigan were playing a team from, let's say, North Korea it would be a lot harder to root against them. But I'd manage.

No matter how bad things get, or how difficult your life may seem, you can thank your lucky stars that your name isn't Kyle Brotzman.

I fully expect to read about his suicide over the holidays.

He literally cost that school millions of dollars.

This is true, but he never would have seen a dime of it anyway.

And now, the dagger ... 37 / 7. Will Rodriguez be joining Brotzman in a double suicide?

Allow me to elaborate. Aside from my long ingrained distaste for all things Blue, I particularly loathe RR.

For many of the same reasons that I can't stand Gary Barnett, Nick Saban, or Lane Kiffin. Whenever carpetbagging maggots like them take their talents to sunnier locales, I wish them nothing but complete and total failure. The more they fall on their collective faces every time they jump the fence, the less likely it is that their fellow coaches will view every other pasture as being greener those which they currently inhabit.

It's not that I'm against upward mobility, but rather that I can't stand the grandstanding and lying they engage in; making promises to players and institutions with their fingers crossed, never intending to honor them. For these are truly men without honor.

My condolences to those who cheer them on.

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