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Jay Cutler sucks, likes Kelly Clarkson

by Ricky O'Donnell on October 27, 2009 at 2:00AM

It has been a bit of a hairy beginning in Chicago for new Bears quarterback Jay Cutler. The savior has been decidedly un-savior-like through six games, frowning his way up and down the field and throwing more interceptions than anyone this side of spaghetti-armed wonder Jake Delhomme.

And to think, Bears fans everywhere were convinced this shoulder-slumping chump was set to be the next Sid Luckman. Ha! Everyone knows Sid Luckman had perfect posture. He did frown, sure, but only at Nazis. And Luckman most certainly wouldn't be caught dead fraternizing with the enemy.

It has become abundantly clear this season that Jay Cutler is no Sid Luckman. He's a wuss, a momma's boy, a namby-pamby. His taste in contemporary pop music only reinforces this.

Kelly Clarkson performed a five-song acoustic set at Hub 51 (51 W. Hubbard St.) on Monday in front of 101.9 FM contest winners and invited guests, including Jay Cutler. The Bears quarterback had dinner and watched as Clarkson sang locker room favorites "I Do Not Hook Up " and "My Life Would Suck Without You."

Bears backup QB Caleb Hanie joined Cutler at the show, which means Cutler likely used the phrase "If I'm going down, you're going down with me" a few times Monday.

The hits keep on coming. 101.9 FM? I knew Jay Cutler's manhood was as questionable as his red zone decision making, but still never would have him pegged for an Eric and Kathy fan. And if you're going to attend something like this, don't you have to bring, you know, a girl instead of your backup?


Is it too late to get Orton back?

102 Comments | Leave a comment

i would totally go to a kelly clarkson acoustic show. i bet it would be pretty good. but i wouldnt want anyone to know I went. I also wouldnt want to let anyone know that I would want to go to a show like that. which is why i'm using the fake name of an obscure sienfeld character

I agree with Todd Gack.


I agree

That's an interesting name, Todd Gack? What is that, Dutch?

Satire? Because it is funny if it is. Good job.

Jay Cutler's the best Ricky, the best.

I once spent the night with Cutler and have to say it was pretty good.

I was talking to Ricky, Seinfeld cast.

Satire. I probably should have linked the Mariotti FJM in there. Jay Cutler rulez, obviously.

Nice pink shirt. I want to throw a snowball at it.

I love Kelly Clarkson. She has an amazing voice. There is nothing wrong with enjoying her music. She is cool, and now I love Jay Cutler for being a fan.

Born and raised a rocker, but no disrespect for Kelly Clarkson. She has an *amazing* voice live, once you peel off all that bullshit backing, acapella she rules. "Because of you" with just her and a piano was awesome. Youtube banned it.

I do not know much about your American footballs, but I do know that the Bears can not play without Urlacher. They are a very Bad team. Very very bad team. If they were here, I would shake my index finger at them, much like I did in this picture.

Perhaps this is one of the most interesting blogs that I have ever seen. Interesting article, Funny comment. Keep it up!

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Jay oh Jay

u suck bad and the people of Chicago know it

video sums up their feelings right now

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