Bearly Relevant: Week Ten, in which we remember Rex with youthful bliss

No one ever believes this (which I find reasonable), but I predicted the White Sox would win the World Series during spring training in 2005. It wasn’t spawned from one of those ridiculous high school Sox-Cubs arguments either. I just remembering thinking as the season neared that they were going to be really good.   

The Sox certainly weren’t the division favs heading into that year, nor did the team look particularly sound on paper. They had rebooted the lineup during the offseason, losing their two best players (Mags and El Caballo) and bringing in a host of new veterans that never seemed to fit anywhere else before.

Looking back on it now, you would have to be crazy to think the Sox were going all the way before the 05 season started. No one knew anything about them. Pretty much the entire team was new. I just had some strange, undying gut feeling that it was going to work out. I couldn’t really explain it, and when people (Cubs fans) asked me to back up my substantial shit talking, I would mumble something about Orlando Hernandez always being on good teams, which I’m not even sure is true. That was also a time in my life when I really liked Shingo Takatsu. When in doubt, go with the team that features a small Asian closer whose out-pitch goes 49 MHP. I’m pretty sure that’s nestled somewhere in the PECOTA algorithm.


I’ve only had that type of gut feeling one other time in my life. It came during Bears training camp in 2006. I was absolutely, 100 percent sold on Rex Grossman. After watching my beloved Bears get screwed by shitty quarterbacks my entire existence, I was positive Rex was up for the job. I just knew he was going to be a star.

There are probably tons of hilariously bad predictions hidden in the archives of this site, but perhaps nothing is worse than my 2007 projection for Grossman (link).

    Pro Bowler, with 3,700 yards passing, 29 touchdowns, and 14 picks.

If you must see them, his actual 07 stats can he found here. Lets just say I was a tad bit off.

So, as you may imagine, the slow realization that Grossman sucked - and, even worse, had become a national punchline - kind of fucked me up a little bit. How could such a strong gut feeling betray me like that? If it led me to the 2005 White Sox, it should be able to lead me anywhere.

Here’s the pathetic thing: I’ve always sort of believed that Rex would one day vindicate me. Even when the Bears named Orton the starter out of camp, which I was totally in favor of, I had visions of Rex leading a late playoff charge, a la Jeff Garcia in Philly. I know he sucks, but something about him always draws me back in.

I’ve been wondering all week if the Bears actually have a chance to win on Sunday against the undefeated Titans. Then it dawned on me: this is Grossman’s last chance ever in a Bears uniform to do something awesome. And Rex could throw for 350 yards and four touchdowns this weekend and I’m not sure it would matter: Kyle Orton isn’t just a damn good quarterback, he’s also, gulp, the unquestioned leader of this team. When Orton went down against the Lions, I bet the players were as bummed as the fans. Some may disagree, but I think that says a lot more about Orton than Rex. The team legitimately believes in Orton, it isn‘t just the company line anymore. There is no quarterback controversy. Orton is the man. He’s earned it.


I’m picking the Bears to lose this week, in part because common sense says Rex (assuming he even plays…) should get stomped by the league’s most ferocious defense, and in part because whenever I pick the Bears to win in this spot, they lose (my anti-jinx stand be damned). But don’t be too shocked if the Bears are able to knock off the Titans, with some old school Grossman bombs leading the offensive charge. Honestly, I wouldn’t put it past him.

*
The spread

Titans -3

Around the Web

Big Daddy Drew: "Collins vs. The Sex Cannon! It’s an erratic thriller!"

Peter King: "Curses! Now we don't get to see 0-11 Detroit host 11-0 Tennessee on Thanksgiving Day. I'm picking Chicago here because at some point Tennessee is going to lose one of these narrow donnybrooks it's been winning."

(Ed. note: "donnybrooks"?)

SI FanNation Sez:

Titans, 68%

ESPN’s expert agree…

87 percent of them think the Titans remain unbeaten.

Key to the game: pass protection

I’m not even sure which quarterback needs perfect protection more, a healthy Grossman or Orton going at 60 percent. The point is that, regardless of who’s starting at on Sunday, the line needs to hold up against Haynesworth and company or this game could get ugly.

Matchup Bears should win

Charles Tillman vs. Justin McCareins

Matchup Bears should lose

Roberto Garza vs. Haynesworth

Sweet 90’s alt rock song that may or may not remind you of Curtis Conway

The Cranberries - Zombie

Bears win if

Grossman proves the city wrong

Bears lose if

Grossman proves the city right

Mock my previous predictions

Bearly Relevant: read them all

In the end

Titans 31, Bears 17